I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
