i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
