we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
