do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
