no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
