That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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