also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Just high enough for therapy.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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