is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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