u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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