oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
