If i come over, it means nothing
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
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