so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
