I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize