it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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