Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
