some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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