thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
