i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
