I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I believe in your delicious
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
