I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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