awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
