Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
