my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
