woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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