Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
