I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
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I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
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That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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