U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
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