my room smells like sperm. sweet.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
