i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
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