Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
