i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
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Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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