Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
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