Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
