do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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