Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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