every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
