I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
high people should be assigned attendants
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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