It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
