i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
