Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
