Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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