But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
