hell yes lets make some ravioli
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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