So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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