Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Randomize