Nicole vs. Life
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
She needs sedatives and a leash
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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