Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(951): View more from California

Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.

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(951): Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already. http://tfl.nu/bhvw

Replies (64) Good night (5086) Bad night (1021)
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(602): View more from Arizona

I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"

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(602): I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on" http://tfl.nu/nkzh

Replies (17) Good night (877) Bad night (3379)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo

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(201): One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo http://tfl.nu/izrq

Replies (16) Good night (4941) Bad night (847)
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(408): View more from California

i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight

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(408): i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight http://tfl.nu/uzvu

Replies (19) Good night (4142) Bad night (790)
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(912): View more from Georgia

you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.

(919): View more from North Carolina

That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.

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(912): you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet. (919): That explains the puddle of pee in my closet. http://tfl.nu/tfvg

Replies (7) Good night (1283) Bad night (5392)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.

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(860): Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success. http://tfl.nu/qxy1

Replies (8) Good night (3474) Bad night (839)
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(503): View more from Oregon

He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you

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(503): He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you http://tfl.nu/gy7n

Replies (11) Good night (1278) Bad night (2992)
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(256): View more from Alabama

Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.

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(256): Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO. http://tfl.nu/k62i

Replies (8) Good night (3618) Bad night (982)
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(214): View more from Texas

Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night

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(214): Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night http://tfl.nu/b3zy

Replies (3) Good night (1999) Bad night (903)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.

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(336): I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat. http://tfl.nu/ctm6

Replies (5) Good night (1852) Bad night (634)
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(519): View more from Ontario

My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.

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(519): My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning. http://tfl.nu/s24c

Replies (20) Good night (3781) Bad night (762)
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(231): View more from Michigan

Is this a drinking picnic?

(701): View more from North Dakota

Is there another kind?

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(231): Is this a drinking picnic? (701): Is there another kind? http://tfl.nu/hhhs

Replies (3) Good night (1123) Bad night (447)
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(316): View more from Kansas

Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.

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(316): Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running. http://tfl.nu/b6k8

Replies (6) Good night (1049) Bad night (540)
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(518): View more from New York

I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock

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(518): I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock http://tfl.nu/0p3e

Replies (0) Good night (587) Bad night (335)
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(315): View more from New York

It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.

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(315): It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked. http://tfl.nu/hjrn

Replies (5) Good night (632) Bad night (170)

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