Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
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