My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
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I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
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