grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
