There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
